As we look toward the spring, I can’t help but stop and think about the upcoming season in pastoral music: Lent, Easter, and of course followed by, wedding season.

Now, prior to being a full-time staff member at NPM, I was the Director of Music at a church for 13 years that hosted 65-70 weddings per year. And during my time there, I met with every couple, helped them plan their music, and played for all of their ceremonies.

I’ve often heard a dreadful saying by pastoral musicians that “I’d rather play three funerals versus one wedding.” While this has always bothered me, I think the roots lie in a mutual misunderstanding of young couples being married, and the pastoral musicians who serve them. The beauty of the Sacrament of Marriage can often be eclipsed by the secular aesthetic that couples mostly worry about, from the flowers to the bridal party to, of course, the bride and groom’s ensembles. But just because a couple may not fully grasp the Sacrament does not mean that they cannot enter into a paradigm of catechesis prior to their wedding day. And in fact, I think we shortchange many couples by assuming they do not grasp a general understanding of the liturgy and how it will relate to their wedding. Why not take it as an opportunity to bridge that gap of understanding, even if only to help them more deeply understand their wedding?

Today on Ministry Monday we speak to Paul Radkowski, Director of Music at the Church of St. Edward the Confessor in Granville, Ohio. Paul discusses the ways that pastoral musicians can support couples as they prepare for the Sacrament of Marriage: how can they best plan their ceremony music? what if a loved one wants to sing in the wedding? What if the couple wants to include secular music in the wedding? Paul addresses these questions and more.